Thursday, July 8, 2010

Feets of Lust

Fan club

So Rory and I were slaving away in the front garden last weekend. The weather was crap but we decided ... scratch that, I decided to get on with the chore anyway. We're ripping out pretty well everything and preparing the soil (such as it is) ready for next spring. I'd booked a rotary hoe and had a heap of compost delivered. I'm really getting a kick out of working in my own patch of land ...

Anyway, at one stage this kid from up the road a bit (must be around 13yo?) walked past on the way down the hill and called out 'Hi!' to us as he walked past. We waved and said "Hi" back and didn't think much of it until he came walking back up the hill about 5 mins later. He had a loaf of bread so had obviously just gone to the dairy and was on the way back home with it. He stopped and leaned on the fence.

"You guys ripping out the whole garden?" he asked.

"Yep," I replied, hacking in to the roots of a scrappy old tree that was well past its expiry date.

"My mum's really pleased that you guys bought this place," the kid continued.

"Yeah?" I replied intelligently, flicking sweat from my brow.

"Yeah. She said this place needs looking after. You guys need a hand?"

"Not at the moment," I grunted, trying unsuccessfully to wrest the bastard tree-stump from the ground. "Maybe tomorrow if you want. We've gotta spread a whole layer of compost over the whole area."

"Cool!" he said.

He asked what time he should turn up and added that he could bring a shovel and a rake. We swapped names - he's Ben - and Ben went on his merry way.

Rory and I knocked off about 4pm, showered, changed clothes and were soon sitting on the back porch to catch the last of the watered-down sun with a G & J.

"Y'know that kid, Ben?" said Rory.

"Yeah. Nice kid. What about him?"

"He's got the hots for us."

"Bullshit," I kindly replied.

"It's true!" laughed Rory. "Did you get the number of times he referred to us as 'you guys'? He's obviously figured out we're a couple ... And why would any young kid voluntarily offer to give up his free time to do gardening work with a couple of poofters?"

Rory was right, of course. It could develop into an awkward situation ... I would have gone to see Ben's mother to check that she was cool with Ben coming to help us but I wasn't exactly sure where they lived.

Next morning Ben's mother (Sandy) rang the front doorbell about half an hour before Ben was due to turn up.

"I hope you guys don't mind Ben hanging around," she said. "His father took off for China last year and ..."

Yada, yada, yada. She explained that she assumed we were gay and a couple and that didn't bother her. She was more concerned about Ben getting in our way!

I told her that Ben was more than welcome and that we'd send him packing when we'd had enough of him.

As it turned out, Ben worked happily in the garden for a couple of hours, we gave him lunch and then sent him on his way. We could tell that he was still fascinated by the fact that we were a gay couple but it never cropped up.

The reason I'm really telling you of this incident is that Ben called in this afternoon anf said his mum had invited us both round for dinner on Saturday night.

We're making friends with the neighbours!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010